Anomalous Tuba
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OBJECT CLASS SYMBOL

Registered Phenomena Code: XXXX

Object Class: Gamma-Red

Hazards: Auditory Hazard

Containment Protocols: It is recommended that all personnel, including researchers and Authority Security personnel, suffer from deafness. Authority web-crawler TU-134 is to find and delete any RPC-XXX-affected broadcasts on the internet. Television broadcasts are to be inspected before being disseminated. Physical containment of RPC-XXX-1 instances is to be carried out by MST Lima-13, "Hellen Killers." RPC-XXX-1 instances are to be kept in Authority custody until further notice. Order T134 is to be executed.

Description: RPC-XXX is a humanoid figure carrying what appears to be a massive unidentified brass instrument with an indeterminate number of bells and valves. RPC-XXX appears randomly during live broadcasts, and begins to play its instrument. RPC-XXX does not play music, instead producing a seemingly random sequence of notes and dissonant harmonies. Broadcasters who were subject to an RPC-XXX appearance have reported that RPC-XXX was not present as they were filming.

Roughly 30% of people who hear RPC-XXX immediately become instances of RPC-XXX-1. RPC-XXX-1 instances are almost completely paralyzed. The only faculties they can control are those necessary for life functions, as well as their vocal cords and their mouths. Many instances of RPC-XXX-1 complain of auditory hallucinations involving tuba sounds. Instances of RPC-XXX-1 also appear to be immune to aging and display surprising longevity. So far, every recorded termination of an instance of RPC-XXX-1 has either been self-inflicted or by their request. See Addendum II

Addendum I: Interviews with RPC-XXX-1 instances

Interviewed: RPC-XXX-1-14

Interviewer: Researcher Thorvald Booth

Foreword: RPC-XXX-1-14, formerly Sandra ████, was affected by RPC-XXX on ██ December, 19██ at age 12, and had been in Authority custody for 6 years at the time of the interview. Researcher Booth was fitted with a hearing aid, as the subject was unable to communicate through sign language or writing.

<Begin Log>

Booth: How are you feeling today, Sandra?

RPC-XXX-1-14: I hope I get back to normal soon.

Booth: I hope so, too.

RPC-XXX-1-14: Please find a way to fix me. I'm starting to hear things.

Booth: What kind of things?

RPC-XXX-1-14: Like some sort of tuba. It was muffled when I first heard it, but it just keeps on getting louder.

Booth: Interesting…Anything else?

RPC-XXX-1-14: No…I just want to get out of here. Please, cure me.

Booth: There, there…we're working as hard as we can for you; don't worry. Now, get a good night's sleep.

<End Log>

Incident report 07/██/00

Interviewed: RPC-XXX-1-52

Interviewer: Researcher Teodoro Cruz

Foreword: This interview was taken on █ July, 2000 when RPC-XXX-1-52 complained of a headache.

<Begin Log>

Cruz: What's going on?

RPC-XXX-1-52: I can feel…the music.

Cruz: What?

RPC-XXX-1-52: The m-music is growing inside me.

Booth: What the fu-

RPC-XXX-1-14's head spontaneously burst, and tuba noises began to sound at 140dB. Researcher Cruz's hearing aid was destroyed, and he became an instance of RPC-XXX-1.

<End Log>

Addendum II: Order T134
All RPC-XXX-1 instances are to be terminated via asphyxiation. Amnestics may be administered if it is required for personnel to continue to fulfill this order.

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