Harold Ruins Containment Protocols (Episode 2)

FalsTV: Episode 2

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Announcer: Welcome to FalsTV! be ready for our second episode of “Harold ruins Everything”!

Announcer: Now please welcome to the stage….Harold!

APPLAUSE.

Audience: Applause.

APPLAUSE.

Audience: Louder Applause.

Harold: The show that is totally not fals, and is totally tru! Hahaha!

LAUGH.

Audience: Laughter

Harold: As we know, the authority contains the anomalous, guilty, innocent, no abnormality is safe. Kinda reminds me of china

Audience: Gasps with Laughter

Harold: It’s true, but let’s not get too political here! Just look at RPC-866! We sacrifice virgins to it it! I mean, I'm all up for christian values, but still!

Audience: Laughter

Harold: Yeah…it’s pretty clear that the Authority doesn’t treat Gamma class RPCs equally to the other classes in this matter aswell, we addressed this in our second episode. When will this cruelty end?…

Audience: Awwww

Harold: I think it’s time we introduce you to our special guess Matthew,

JAZZY MUSIC WITH CLAPPING AND CHEERING.

Matthew: Where am I? I was just in the park eating cookies-

Harold: Hey pal and welcome to the show!

Matthew: Your the one who gave me the cookies… YOU DRUGGED ME-

Harold: Interrupts Matthew

Harold: What's your view point on the state of the poor anomalous who are treated like slaves and acted upon like Jews in a concentration camp?

Matthew: Anomalous? Concentration camp? WHERE THE FUCK AM I-

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OPENING THEME

Announcer: Welcome back to FalsTV! With your host…..Harrrooold!

APPLAUSE.

Audience: Applause.

Harold: Thank you! Thank you!

Harold: Alright, let’s go back to Matthew. Here with me on the show today is fellow Head Researcher Dr. Blight, Dr. Blight how are you today?

Dr. Blight: I’m very excited Harold. Thanks for letting me spread the word of containment on your show.

Harold: Here is Dr. Blight, excellent scholars and immortal being. Please tell me about yourself.

RPC-115: Well, Harold, I have been in the Authority for decades, using life extending RPCs such as yourself. You know, some of our containment protocols are so uneducated that we have literally accidentally given me immortality due to this ring. They dedicate all of their resources to our containment, yet I can easily stroll out of here, It's hard being immortal, if I die and anyone touches this ring they become me, It’s not my fault that I can wipe entire brains, or kill humans by making them all brain dead, or start global wars between humans. It’s all just in my nature nature.

RPC-115: and other anomalies lives matter.

Harold: What a interesting history, remind me not to your ring for my wedding.

LAUGHTER.

Harold: As you see we have a outsider in our studio to get his thoughts on the matter.

Matthew: I have no clue why I'm here, from what I'm hearing this is against human rights??

Dr. Blight: And thank you, Mister for understanding! If one group of anomalies should get rights it should be us Sapients!

GASP.

Audience: …..

Harold: Sir that's quite, how do I say this. Hazardphobic statement.

Matthew: Uhh, can I leave now-

Dr. Blight: rises from his chair

Dr. Blight: I DEMAND RIGHTS FOR MY KIND! HUMAN RIGHTS MATTER!

CHANTING "HUMAN RIGHTS MATTER."

Harold: Oh god, oh fuc- CUT THE FILM CUT THE FILM!

Tape whirling

Harold: Thank you for watching, and remember, it's not fals and it's totally tru!

APPLAUSE NOW.

[[Credits]]

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